"Forget Me Not"- A Thanksgiving Reflection

"Bless the LORD oh my soul, and forget not all of his benefits! (vs. 2)" I am certain that the only reason David is reminding himself to "forget not" is because he is aware of his natural tendency to "forget" who God is and all He has done.  Ahhh how I can relate to David! How quickly I forget who God is to me and what He has done for me!  THREE times David tells his soul to BLESS God on the basis of his benefits.  He is urging his soul to NEVER forget.  He is commanding his innermost being to GIVE THANKS and relish in the goodness and grace of God.  As I am studying through these verses I can't help but be reminded that we are approaching Thanksgiving, the one day marked on our entire calendar year that we are supposed to "give thanks".  I wonder what our lives as Christians would look like if EVERYDAY was a day of Thanksgiving.  Would not our moods be better, our outlooks be brighter, our perceptions be clearer, and our great God be lifted higher?  Ok, have you ever noticed that David can tend to be somewhat of a "complainer" throughout his Psalms but that in Psalm 103 there is not a single complaint?  I believe that when we go on and on and on about the goodness and benefits of God, we simply can't complain! When we talk about how he is our healer, it's harder to complain about our sickness (vs.3)!  When we acknowledge his forgiveness, we won't sulk in our shame (vs.3)! When we are constantly acknowledging and reminding ourselves  of who God is and what He has done for us, thanksgiving will naturally begin to flow out of us!  The mile long list of everything that is "wrong" or "sub-par" in our lives will slowly begin to fade into the backdrop and joy, peace and hope will begin to spring up in our hearts. 

Thanksgiving shouldn't be the only day that we choose to reflect on the evidence of God's love and faithfulness in our lives.  We should DAILY say, "Bless the LORD oh my soul, and forget not all of His benefits!" If you are like me, giving genuine praise and thanks to God will STILL be a challenge even on the day that is specifically dedicated to doing so.   But my prayer is that I will follow in David's footsteps and command my soul to bless Him and "Forget him not". 

Noelle Elizabeth Grace: My Birth Story

At 2:38am June 14th, 2012, I am ever so gently, but most assuredly awakened out of a deep sleep with what I like to call, a "surge".  Something Just told me, "this is it."  I was so excited to learn that the couple mile walk my husband INSISTED we take just hours before had finally kick-started my long awaited labor!  As I laid in bed, I calmly reached over and grabbed my iphone so that I could use the ever so handy, Full Term- Labor Contraction timer app!  My first few contractions where about every 5 to 7 minutes or so.  But within about 30 minutes, they were averaging about every three minutes and were far to uncomfortable to simply lie there and sulk in them :).  Sooooo, I gave my midwife a quick call to let her know that each contraction was coming pretty close together.  I hadn't yet reached the 5-1-1 rule of thumb (contractions coming every 5 minutes, lasting one minute each, for one hour), BUT being the semi-hyper person that I am, I gave her a ring.  She was INSISTENT that it was nothing and that I probably was in early early labor and that my baby would not come until close to Sunday (mind you this is Thursday morning :) ). Slightly insulted, I went back to bed feeling a bit sorry for myself.  I figured, "well, maybe she is right..I'll try to go back to sleep".  That lasted all of about 15 minutes.  Around 5:00am or so, I decided to pace around my home to aid in speeding up my labor as well as coping with the discomfort.  In the weeks proceeding this morning, I started to download tons of praise and worship music to my iPod to listen to during labor.  Soooo, at 5:00am while it was completely dark throughout our entire house, I walked around with worship music blasting in my ears and singing at the top of my lungs.  About every 2 to 5 minutes, let's just say a joyful NOISE was coming out of my mouth as I grunted and vocalized through the intense contractions!  I must say that it was one of the most intimate and powerful worship times I have ever had with Jesus.  As I paced through the cool darkness, I was overwhelmed with the light of Christ.  My heart was heavy with the thought of the pain that He went through to bring me life through His death, burial and resurrection.  Although the pain I felt, was nothing of what he felt on the cross, I knew that His example of conquering and finishing strong would give me the strength to fight through my labor and birth in order to bring life into this world.  I KNEW the Lord was with me.  He had carried me through this entire pregnancy, reminding me that I am more than capable of birthing my baby the way that I always dreamed: naturally, in the water.  Whenever I doubted being able to go through with it (unless, of course, there was a complication or emergency) I sensed His grace and encouragement.  Around 6:00am, I decided to call my midwife again because I felt tons of pressure and my contractions where almost always 3 minutes apart.  Once again, she INSISTED that it was premature to call her and that I needed to not get my hopes up and try to focus on something else.  I told her I was still going to drive close to the birth center (which was 45 minutes away) and just hang out in Little Italy (a cute little area in Downtown San Diego) because I was so sure that the time was rapidly approaching.   I hung up the phone, discouraged, but trusting my body.  I knew it was going to happen soon, so I woke up my husband and jumped in the shower. After my shower, the contractions had most definately been coming every 3 minutes apart lasting about 1 minute for about 30 minutes.  We grabbed our suitcase and cooler full of food and drinks and were on our way to the Birthing Center!  I must say that driving for 40 minutes with contractions was challenging since I was not able to stretch out or walk.  Before arriving at Birthing Center, we made a pitstop for coffee in Little Italy!  During this time we were on the phone with several family members letting them know what was happening!  Just a quick side note: My mother-in-law and sister Brooke where still in Arizona but planned to attend my birth so at this point they were booking a flight last minute and jumping on planes!! And YES, they both made it:).  Soooooo, after getting coffee, we called the midwife again to let her know that the 5-1-1 had happened! She reluctantly agreed to meet me at the Birthing Center by 9:00am (still pretty much convinced that she would have to send me home :))  We arrived right on time, but waited in the parking lot so that I could labor in the fresh air for a bit.  People probably thought I looked crazy hanging on to the back of my car breathing and vocalizing through the pain!!  To keep me nourished I kept nibbling on high protein snacks and drinking vita-waters! (The fact that I was allowed to eat/drink whatever and whenever I wanted was so wonderful for me).  My midwife arrived at around 9:20 and found me bouncing on the birthing ball to ease up my back labor.  I would say more than anything, the back labor was far more difficult to bear than the typical uterine contractions.  There where moments when I thought someone was breaking my back with a hammer!  My midwife and I talked for about 10 to 15 minutes before I asked her to check and see how far along I was.  As she prepared to check my cervix I thought for sure she was going to tell me I was at a 3 or 4 at the most, upon evaluating the level of pain I was experiencing.  Oh, how I let out a massive shout when she said, " You are 7 centimeters"!!  I was so thrilled to hear that I had progressed so quickly with a fairly decent pain tolerance.  At that point, I knew I could do it! Not to mention, the look on my sweet midwife's face was priceless when she gave me the news!  Let's just say she was VERY happy that I chose to trust my body rather than follow her advice.  If I had stayed home, I may have had my baby on my couch or on the side of the road! Right away I asked her if I could get in the tub! I had been waiting for so long to see what it would feel like to  labor in the warm water.  She gladly said yes, filled up the tub, and I plopped right in!

Right when I got in!

Somewhat Comfortable!

In between contractions I was happy and laughing and relatively comfortable! BUT during contractions I was more like...............

I was trying really hard to concentrate. Swaying and rocking back and forth really helped me through the contractions.

I tried to stay hydrated as well, even though at this point the thought of drinking or eating anything made me sick!

20 minutes after getting in the tub, I asked the midwife to check me again because my contractions really intensified and I felt the baby really low.  She checked me and I was already at 10 centimeters!  She then proceeded to tell me that I could start pushing whenever I wanted and that I just needed to do it with each contraction.  So I started to push but was unsure at first how and where to do it.  I also was afraid of doing it hard! lol But she reassured me and after a few tries with contractions I was able to navigate through it!  Noelle was crowned for about 45 minutes to an hour I believe! It was VERY hard work!  It wasn't until the 30 minutes or so leading up to her birth that I thought I couldn't do it.  As I was was pushing the transition and the burning was SO intense that I thought that I was going to pass out at one point!  Minutes before she was born I was screaming at the top of my lungs and giving it everything I had left!  I remember everyone in the room (Midwife, nurse, husband, mother, mother-in law, dad, 3 sisters, grandma and grandpa, and not to mention about 10 family members on Skype lol!!) telling me that she was "right there".  I finally mustered up the courage to reach down and touch her!  When I felt that soft/slimy hair, I suddenly felt empowered to finish the task! I knew she would be in my arms in no time! I remember my dad telling me, "You got this Big Baby (my nickname :)". I felt so encouraged! My husband kept telling me how proud he was of me that we had come so far! Then, I looked up at my mom and said, "Mom, do you think if I give one more good push with everything I have inside of me that she will come out?" and my mom responded, "YES!!".  So I gave one last big push! It was by far the the most painful push and the one responsible for my second degree tare:), but was the one that delivered my baby into my hands!  I reached down and pulled my baby's body completely out of me, up through the water and placed her on my own chest! She was finally here!

Moments after she was born!

Trying to open her little eyes!

The moment my husband and I said her name, she looked right up at us! My husband LOST it and so did I!!  The tears running down our faces were tears of immense joy and thankfulness! It was BEAUTIFUL!  Throughout the next several hours, my battle scars were attended too :), my baby and I started out on the crazy adventure of nursing (a blog about my experience with it is coming soon), and we packed up to go home!

Snuggling! Excuse how I look :) I'm sure most of y'all know, birthin' a baby is TAXING on the body!

We got her dressed and were ready to go home at about 7:00 that night!

All ready to go!

This yellow sweater has a very special and unique history in my family!  Not only did Noelle wear this sweater home from the Birthing Center, but I wore it home from the hospital when I was born and my MOTHER wore it home from the hospital when she was born!  So far 3 generations have worn it for their homecoming outfits!

All if all it was the most wonderful, and empowering experience (aside from meeting Jesus :)) that I have EVER had! My husband and I are sooooooo blessed and are truly enjoying our little one!!

A recent pic of our little family!

Special shout out to my wonderful mother, Denise, big sis I never had, Brooke Stanley, and lovely friend, Brittni Mesic, for encouraging me and inspiring me to birth naturally! Because you ladies did it so beautifully before me, I knew it was possible! For that, I am forever grateful!